Here's your sign

It is a sad day when someone in the world needs a sign like this:

I mean, really, you had a question on where your used toilet paper should go?

3 spooky foods and 1 wildly inappropriate pumpkin

Last weekend we attended a Halloween party at our friend Sleepy’s house. You’ve seen pictures of their house before, when there was a tortoise on the roof. Well, something you also should know is that Sleepy and his wife Mrs. Sleepy are expecting a baby. Like, any day now. And still felt motivated to host a Halloween party for all of their friends, bouncy castle and all.

Yes, there was a bouncy house. Because what Halloween party would be complete without full-grown adults dressed up as fictional characters jumping around in a pink and purple castle?

Well, the boys happened to see a photo of a pumpkin carved and modeled to look like a woman giving birth (also, I might have found this photo and happened to send it to them). They decided it would be a brilliant idea to replicate this pumpkin masterpiece and give it to Sleepy and the Mrs. to decorate their Halloween party. So they did.

Here is the original photo:

 Here is the boys’ completed masterpiece:

There may be a little tongue-in-cheek humor aimed at Sleepy insinuating that he is not the father of pumpkin Mrs. Sleepy’s baby, if you are wondering why the pumpkin “baby” is painted a different color. In case it wasn't inappropriate enough already.

While the boys were busy carving their pumpkin, I was busy baking. I saw so many great ideas for Halloween-themed treats that I couldn't pick just one and decided to go on a giant baking frenzy. I was quite proud of the results.

Cheese-ball monsters:

Candy Corn sugar cookies:

And “Guacamoldy” eyes:

 Happy Halloween!!!

Hoarder's Remorse

As you may have gathered from some of my previous posts, while I don't consider myself to be anything near an actual hoarder, I do have a tendency to collect and keep things that provide no real intrinsic value to my life.  Usually I keep these things for one of three reasons:

1. Nostalgia
2. I am almost certain that at some point they will be useful again
3. They got stuffed somewhere and I forgot I had them

Reason #1 is why I keep things like expired driver's licenses from various states.  Reason #2 is why I have clothes in my closet that are two sizes too small... because one day that diet WILL work and I will fit in those clothes again!  Reason #3 is not really a reason at all.  But it explains why I find coupons for businesses that no longer exist and pens that have run out of ink.

Moving day is usually a big clean-out day.  You must weigh the importance of keeping your junk with the effort involved in packing, transporting, and unpacking your junk.  And also finding a suitable hidey-hole in your new place in which to stuff it.

Which is why I remember so clearly that day 2 weeks ago when I looked at the binder full of print-your-own CD labels that I had bought for wedding favors over 3 years ago.  You know, the kind that if you want to make someone a mix CD you can create a personalized cover, put the paper in your printer, then peel off the sticker and slap it on the top of the CD?  They worked great for the specialized CDs we gave our wedding guests but I thought, "who gives mix CDs anymore when there's flash drives and iTunes?"  So I threw them all out.

Only today, I needed to make a duplicate copy of a DVD, and wanted a professional cover, rather than hand-writing the name of the video on the CD in permanent marker.  And there's irony for you.  I don't use the darn things for 3 years and yet, 2 weeks after I throw them away, I actually could've used them...

Turning 29 again

So September marked the 3rd anniversary of my 29th birthday.  It's not that I think I'm old, it's just that more and more often I realize my lifestyle is slowly sliding into something settled.  Not that it's a bad thing.  It's just a thing.  I want to spend my time differently now - I just can't help but notice the changes.  Like when I'm sitting on the couch on a Friday night, watching television with my cat and my husband, struggling to keep my eyes open after 10:30.  There used to be at time in my life when 10:30 meant I was just getting into the dance club.

My birthday celebration reflected my current lifestyle.  I had a fabulous dinner celebration with my close friends and my parents.  We gorged ourselves on Italian food and laughed and had a general good time - but afterwards?  No partying - I just wanted to go home and relax on the couch.

But something that will definitely make you feel old?  Seeing your old collectible figurines in an antique store:

It's like a showroom!

Since our new bedroom set has finally arrived, and since my life seems to be so insanely full of things that when I actually find time to sit down and blog about it I draw a complete blank and end up posting nothing, I figured I would share with you the beauty and wonderment that is our new bedroom.  With real furniture and everything.

Attempting to make our house grown-up

It's been almost 2 1/2 years since we bought this house. One of the things about bouncing all over the west coast for our jobs is that we don't spend enough time at our house to get all those finishing touches done.  Things like putting up photographs or buying houseplants or even, um, finishing hanging the shutters because your husband threw out all the little hinges and they haven't sold hinges like that at Home Depot since 20 years ago when your house was built and now you're going to have to order them online but that seems like a lot of work.

We also have what you might call, "furniture essentials."  We have a couch, which is so comfortable all your friends and family start buying the same model and it may or may not suck you into a vortex of downy cushioned goodness from which you will never escape.  We also have a TV (well, 2 TVs, which would make sense if you know my husband at all), an entertainment center in which to display the TV, and some various other items like guest room furniture and a dining table.

One thing we do not have, however, is a bedroom set.  We do have one of those black metal thingies that sets your box frame up off the ground, so in that respect we are a step above the college days of having your mattress sit right on the floor, but otherwise our bedroom is generally a hodge-podge of miscellaneous furniture that has been collected over the years.  We have what should be a glass-topped end table and a coffee table functioning instead as nightstands; a cheap fake-wood corner entertainment center sitting in a corner of the bedroom, complete with VCR and DVD player but, until recently, lacking a TV... and that's about it.

But today is a momentous day, folks.

WE HAVE A BEDROOM SET.  Like real grown-ups, y'all.

Well, technically since we ordered the bedroom set online, it won't get here for another month.  Except the matching desk, which was delivered today.  But it counts anyway - and very soon we will have a dresser and a bed with headboard and footboard and THEY WILL ALL MATCH.

Super Giant Fish at our Front Door

So, I just realized the Big Buck Hunter has been in our front entryway for OVER TWO YEARS. I keep holding out hope that one day we'll class it up enough to move that thing somewhere... not so obvious. Like a Man Cave. Chris DEFINITELY needs a Man Cave. I think his new ploy is keep buying hideously unsophisticated things that have no business in the house so that we end up with so much redeneck man-crap in our front foyer that I have no choice but to agree to let him have a man cave. And, oh, yeah, his giant mounted fish finally arrived.

You can't quite tell here, but this thing is "to scale" meaning that fish is about 6 feet long.

Note the Big Buck Hunter in the background...

And, in the true irony that is my life, the boys fired up the Big Buck Hunter and began playing while I was typing this blog.  (They had to move the fish out of the way first, of course.)